These days, cryptic body language is a hot topic for everyone from performance specialists to life tutors, gossip columnists to dating masters. Body language is the art of creating a visual text, something to be read and interpreted by another person. Capturing a potential mate under your spell can be accomplished with your eyes, voice, facial expressions, and more. Their early evaluation of you will be heavily based on your body language.
To see a real body language master in action, rent a few James Bond films and examine the poetics and power gestures he displays. Bond never seems uncertain of how to move or act and he never twitches or behaves nervously. Everything James does is a little slower than an ordinary person. He gives off a cool vibe through his visual texts. Women, observe the Bond girls and their poetic and powerful gestures.
Practice rotating your head slowly, blinking slowly, and changing facial expressions slowly; do every gesture slowly. This makes a huge impact on how others feel about you. Think of how an actor or actress constantly unifies poetics and power gestures in their body language, creating a specific style that is all their own and incredibly captivating. By using the cues provided by the text and the directors, actors compose visual texts through their gestures and physical movements.
Know Your DNA Code
Your entire body is like a DNA code of seduction, able to send specific signals depending on which parts you use and how. It makes sense to understand how you can (and cannot) use your body to reveal your true intentions.
This ancient behavior is programmed in our DNA to allow us to make clear what we want. Body language is inherited both from our ancestors as well as numerous encounters throughout our lives. Through movements, gestures, eye contact and facial expressions, you can discern a person’s truest intentions.
Here is the list of code tools you have in your DNA kit. Become familiar with how yours compliment and contrast one another.
Head: Face, cheek, chin, mouth, lips, teeth, tongue, nose, eyes, eyebrow, forehead, and hair.
Arm: Elbow, hand, and fingers.
Torso: Neck, shoulder, chest, back, belly, bottom, and hips.
Legs: Thigh, knee, and foot.
Broadcasting to the World
Laughter is the best medicine, and it’s also the quickest way to someone’s heart. A hearty laugh may be the ultimate script for seducing and charming a person of curiosity, but keep it sincere and appropriate, not forced. A smile and a laugh are contagious and draw individuals to us; a good sense of humor is one of the most appealing traits you can display. But if genuine laughter does not bubble quickly to your lips, there are many other ways to nonverbally communicate what you want to say.
By familiarizing ourselves with a handful of basic nonverbal signals, we can enhance our ability to comprehend what someone is genuinely feeling. This awareness will help us realize what we are broadcasting to the world with our own nonverbal cues.
The signals we give off can be grouped into general categories: aggression, attentiveness, boredom, deception, defensiveness, dominance, emotion, evaluation, greetings, openness, power, readiness, relaxation, romance, and submission. We often intuitively understand what a person is saying with their gestures and body positions, and we send out our own messages in return.
However, rarely do we stop to really evaluate the means with which we accomplish this. Often, a person considered to have great intuition about other people turns out to be a careful observer. They watch individuals and pick up conscious or unconscious nonverbal cues. Body language and behavioral cues are very easy to become aware of, but there is a lot to understand. Make sure you observe the body language signs closely, and as soon as you spot a gesture signifying you are on the right course, keep proceeding in that direction. If the opposite happens, just modify your own language, verbal and nonverbal alike, and see what happens.
Here are some simple body language signs: Frequency of eye contact―the more the better. Amount of time they hold your gaze―the longer the better. The way they break off eye contact―do they look down before they look away? Shine of the eyes―the brighter the better. Direction of body lean―toward you is good, away is bad. Overall posture―erect and alert are a positive. Tilt of the head―increased tilt is an encouraging sign. Position of objects being held―if a drink is held in front of the face like a barrier, you’re off-track. Hand activity―clenching, squeezing, or pinching is bad; open hands making absent stroking movements is a great sign.
Many of us are a little nervous (but also stimulated) in settings where social interaction is expected and needed, so most people do not sit or stand in an open posture, inviting that engagement of conversation or activity. In a courtship, however, the more open the other person’s posture is, the more receptive they are to you and your advances.
Your Communication Arsenal
Facial expression is a foremost skill to have in your communication arsenal; the demeanor of your face will paint a picture much clearer than any words could do. Your face may show happiness, sadness, attentiveness, affection, admiration, adoration, appreciation, understanding, or empathy, and your date will know just how you feel about a topic or situation. Learn to control your facial cues and maintain that dash of mystery that is so intriguing.
Many individuals are oblivious of how loudly they speak with their bodies. Our use and scrutiny of body language are largely unconscious. We all have an innate sense of what certain cues mean, however. What do these subtle codes mean to you?
A sidelong glance; a few covert glances; a brief stare; downcast eyes; a newly alert posture; an absent hair adjustment; a full turn towards you; a tilted head; slightly narrowed eyes; a smile; a posture match; sparkling eyes; a sensual lip-licking.
Depending on the person, each might hold a slightly different meaning, but overall they mean one crucial thing: your date is flirting with you. He or she wants you to continue conversing and intriguing them as the night goes on.
There is a highly emotional connection in two people simultaneously observing each other’s eyes, a dialect all its own. A visual connection arouses strong emotions, revealed in a change in breathing rate, heart rate, and palm sweat.
For example, if you are having problems in your relationship, and your woman or man gives you that certain look, you know it’s time to talk about it. Likewise, when things are going well, their eyes will lock on you with great desire and overwhelming affection.
Eye contact isn’t the only good sign when it comes to body language. The following are also pointing towards a good connection:
“Alertness or increased energy.
Gradually opened posture.
A lowered drink (or other potential barrier).
Gentle self-touches or caresses of objects.
Steady crossed legs.
Shoe dangling on the toe.
Hands moved away from the face.
A touch to you.
Feet planted firmly on the floor.
A smile sends a positive, warm, and important universal code. A smile says, “I will not reject you. I desire you.” A smile combined with prolonged eye contact says, “I desire you a lot. I want to know you. Let’s talk.” This displays friendliness and self-confidence, two of the most attractive qualities in a potential lover. In every language, in every culture, a smile universally reveals a caring individual behind the expression. Smile!
Keep Them Guessing
You want to attract and then ensnare a lover with your charms, intriguing them with your personality and seemingly effortless mannerisms. To do this, you need to tap into the feeling part of the brain. Get them thinking about you, wondering about you, and maybe even daydreaming about you.
One of the simplest and most effective ways to do this is to vary your body language presentation. Switch up how you present yourself on each progressive date, so they never quite know what to expect. Remember, a person would rather be just about anything (even mad, sad, or anxious) than bored. Therefore, varying your body language and even your surface personality, occasionally, will keep them in a state of trying to figure you out. Of course you should have a body language persona that you project, one that you are proud of and one that reflects your inner self. You should not become an utterly different person every time you see them―they will just think you are crazy. But change things up a bit.
Create a laid-back, confident body language attitude, but sometimes get riled up about subjects you find passion in. Use your body language to add excitement to others’ humdrum lives. Project a charismatic and mysterious body language that will touch everyone you meet.
The Visual Texts of Hollywood
Watch Brad Pitt, George Clooney, or any other man with high status and you will notice that they move differently than the rest of us. They have an aura about them; they know they are attractive and powerful, and their body language expresses that. It is this confidence that women fawn over, that gossip columnists gush about, and that other men are jealous of.
You could say that these men strut, almost like roosters among chickens. They deliver snappy lines with enviable precision, and exude self-assurance that doesn’t quite cross the line into cockiness.
In the remake of the film “Ocean’s Eleven,” examine every scene of Brad Pitt’s. His attitude and lines are some of the foremost ever seen in a motion picture, especially when it comes to the study of successful body language. Every scene with Brad Pitt and George Clooney together is full of powerful body language. When they speak, they add long pauses between lines, adding mystery, coolness, and a degree of revelation to even the simplest command.
Why are individuals like Hollywood’s James Dean, Marlon Brando, Robert Redford, Richard Gere, and Tom Cruise so regarded for their performances and on-screen sexual appeal? Their physical good looks certainly help, but plenty of handsome male wannabes never made it.
James Dean is an iconic, nearly legendary character. He was an archetype of imperturbability, fearlessly walking the narrow line between normalcy and rebellion. He seized the universe (both physical and psychological) around him as if it were easy, and his body language conveyed extreme confidence and youthful responsiveness.
Without body language, an actor or actress’s lines seem dull and staged. Body communication conveys distinct character, deep emotion, and intense feeling, even and especially in the middle of drastic situations.
An actor or actress’s body language is most successful when he or she: Makes strong, sure eye contact, and is last to break it off. Walks with a dominant, confident posture and step. Moves and gestures slowly and deliberately, without being self-conscious. Keeps his or her head and chest up, taking up more visual space than should be possible. Doesn’t allow his or her arms and legs to be awkward and useless, but places them deliberately and in a commanding manner.
While the woman’s versions of dominant, commanding, and deliberate may look slightly different from the man’s, both sexes can learn much from the powerful visual art of the movies.
The actress is a master of seduction. Her body language can effortlessly inspire fluttering hearts and beckon a crowd towards her without a single word. Some of the greatest actresses in Hollywood―like Jodie Foster, Sandra Bullock, Nicole Kidman, and Meryl Streep―have much to teach the woman who wants to learn to exude confidence and sensual attractiveness as a counterpart to the handsome stars of the screen.